Seattle police arrest armed man following his 'copulation' with Trader Joe’s refrigerator

( Post Millennial )

Seattle police arrested a 33-year-old man on Thursday afternoon after a chaotic and disturbing scene unfolded at a Capitol Hill Trader Joe’s, where the suspect reportedly threatened to kill people while armed with a knife, shortly after allegedly attempting to engage in a sex act with a store refrigerator.

According to a darkly humorous post on the Seattle Police Department’s blotter titled “Cold Hard Facts,” the incident began around 2:15 pm on August 5, at the Trader Joe’s in the 1700 block of East Madison Street.

Police say the man, who is a registered sex offender, was confronted by a security guard after allegedly “humping” a refrigerator and making similar advances toward a customer.

The man became agitated, kicking over a flower display and throwing apples. He then reportedly began shouting racial slurs and brandished a knife, threatening to kill everyone inside the store.

Multiple officers arrived on the scene and arrested the suspect for felony harassment. He was booked into the King County Jail.

While the SPD’s post struck a tongue-in-cheek tone, joking that “the suspect’s life might get a lot harder if he is not allowed to come within 500 feet of a fridge,” the charges are serious. The case has been assigned to detectives in the department’s Homicide and Assault Unit.

The incident adds to ongoing public concerns about crime, mental health crises, and repeat offenders in Seattle’s retail and public spaces.